THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL by obi

[spoilers]

The story is about two sisters who, motivated by their family's ambition, compete for the affection of King Henry VIII of the House of Tudor.

Mary Boleyn, younger of the two (at least in the film), becomes the King's choice despite her being married to a local commoner and the family's designs for her sister Anne Boleyn to be the pick. The drive roots from the Queen's inability to give King Henry a male heir which eventually leads him to seek for a concubine. Mary eventually gave birth to a male heir but by that time Anne, who didn't stop furthering her ambition to enamor the King, was already able to finally snatch the monarch's special attention. Henry VIII disclaimed his son to Mary and blindly sued for Anne's love.

Taking advantage of the situation, Anne plotted for herself to be the legitimate Queen of England which substantiated after compelling the King to do crazy stuffs (i.e. turning from the Catholic catechism and dethroning his own wife, Catherine of Aragon). However, all the comforts that came with it was short-lived as Anne Boleyn, after giving birth to a daughter, miscarried another daughter that triggered marital problems with the King similar to that of the former Queen Katherine's.

Complexities turned into more problems and even into incest which ultimately caused Anne Boleyn's death sentence. She's the mother of the last monarch of Tudor... Queen Elizabeth I (a female heiress, after all the King's quest to have a male successor).

The storyline, although patterned in this factual period in the House of Tudor, is a mishmash of historical inconsistencies added to give a cinematic appeal to the plot. I think, it produced the intended effect. Dramatic points in the movie are compelling and the script-works involved are done fairly well. I have something against the pacing as often it jumps over supposedly long periods of time without good transitionary scenes. It makes the film seem to be rushed, overshadowing the superb acting-job made by most of the casts.

Speaking of, Scarlett Johansson (Mary Boleyn) and Natalie Portman (Anne Boleyn) - sans my total crushness on her - did a terrific portrayal of their roles' supposed personalities. The innocently naive Mary and the ambitious headstrong Anne. Throughout the film, both actresses have been skillfully in character that you can feel what the roles should convey. Eric Bana (King Henry VIII) borders on mediocrity while Anna Torrent (Catherine of Aragon) performed strongly but lacks exposure. Another performance to take note is of the Boleyn son, George (Jim Sturgess - Jude in the Beatles film "Across the Universe"), whose supporting role produced a good chemistry with his sister Anne on the film.

The production is of no question. Great costumes, nice settings, and the overall quality of reliving the Tudor era of England is there. Excuses aside for the Victorian geeks who might have seen flaws on the accuracy of the sets.

In all, it's a great film to capture the heart. The ending seems a bit dragging but the meaning is there. It may not be of classic status nor as comparable to other movies built around the Tudor controversies but it sure is inspirational and moving to watch.

Seven out of ten.

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INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL by jaiskizzy

the gist: the bullwhip-cracking, fedora-wearing, snake-fearing hero is back! it's been nineteen years since the last crusade, and an aged, wiser henry jones jr. puts his teaching career on hold once again for another thrill-filled treasure quest. with former flame marion ravenwood and her son, mutt, indy is after the crystal skull, a legend-laden artifact that supposedly is the key to unparalleled wealth and power. he must use his plan-as-he-go skills to prevent it from falling into the evil hands of the russians, led by irina spalko, and return it to its rightful place. adventure has a synonym and it's indiana jones!

not one sliver of shadow of doubt about it: this is an indiana jones movie. from the old-school paramount logo (nice touch btw) fading into a prairie dog mound to the sweet albeit starwars-ish ending, you can bet your fanboy ass this is an indiana jones movie. i sat there in the movie theater (dodging irksome sidecomments from morons) reduced to the little boy i was when i first saw raiders of the lost ark on betamax and watched with glee my childhood hero come to life again. the moment the hat was picked up and put on in a silhouette next to a star, i had supernova nostalgic orgasm. harrison ford has been han solo, rick deckard and jack ryan, but he will always be indiana jones to me. yes, the age shows on his face but, whip me sideways, the dude can still kick derrières. indy is just an entirely different persona complete with his own facial expressions, way of speaking and quirks and i cannot see anyone else being him. the pratfallings, i thought were a bit too much though. here is a guy who relies on quick-thinking and pure luck and then you see him topple a bike over. oh, well.

the indy movies are famous for their over-the-top, bite-your-collar action sequences and indy 4 delivers on that aspect. the warehouse scene and campus bike chase were great appetizers and the jungle chase, a sumptuous main course. also, in staying true to theme, (1 had snakes, 2 had insects, 3 had rats) the new "creepy-crawly" and no, it's not the scorpion that stings mutt. speaking of mutt, i think it aint no spoiler anymore to lay down the cards and say that he is indy's son, his mom, being marion ravenwood, indy's first true love. this marion's a far cry from the tequila-guzzling femme fatele in raiders, but you immediately see that after all those years, she and indy are meant for each other. the boyish smile on indy's face the first time he sees marion again and the girlie smile on marion face when indy answers her question about his other women were goshdarn cute. plus, nice nods to marcus brody and henry jones sr., btw. but where's sallah and short round!?

anyways, cate blanchett wasnt much of a villain. her whole performance fell way behind the single scene in raiders when toht faces a captive marion and reveals an apparatus that looks like he'll use to torture her but actually turns out to be a coat hanger. but man, this woman is gorgeous, even with the wig she borrowed from uma thurman. and then there's post-sam witwicky shia labeouf. what makes "the beef" good is that he does not strive to be boytoy cute. here, he's a wannabe tough guy who trembles in fear entering an old graveyard. i dont know about you guys but i bought the idea of him as thirdy. that exchange of "whoa" between indy and him is a one-syllable testament of their realization that they really are father and son. the final scene with that hat thing is definitely a sequel hint and i could imagine a last crusade-like sequel where mutt is in school but wants in on his dad's archaeological adventures, and through some riddle in the mail, a sick marion finds out indy's in trouble and mutt goes out to save him. yeah, that could work.

i love this film and it pains me to admit its flaws (but then again, that is what love is all about, i guess). david koepp's patchwork script of the piecemeal leftover ideas from previous indy 4 attempts was evident throughout the movie. it didnt gel together as much as any of the first three and changes tonally in every scene. i like the part that plays on indy's fear of snakes, but it felt like it was an squeezed-in scene. another qualm i have was the meh cinematography. whoever this janusz guy is, he needs to brush up on his kubrick before he can match the visual edge of the first three indy films. his camera work was ok, but nothing special or surprising. the cameo of the ark of the covenant (from raiders of the lost ark) was a quickie spectacle for me but it seemed forced. i like my easter eggs inconspicuous, thank you very much.

finally, steven spielberg is a wonderful director, but you could definitely notice from scenes that george lucas was breathing down his neck the whole time. this dude just wont give in. he bitched about the script for many years and im sure even when all the hands have shaken, he still bitched about a lot of his stupid notions. george lucas, you are nuts. enough with your sci-fi crap and do something else, will you? produce another howard the duck, i dont care. just do something else. haven't you learned from the star wars prequels? grow up, man!!!

to anyone who will hate the movie, dude, it's make-believe. do not over-analyze. and if you think the whole [spoiler] thing is far-fetched, isn't a biblical box of spirits or a cup that can heal wounds just as far-fetched? anyways, to me, indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull is a new soup with old ingredients mixed with a few new ones that tastes as good as before. yum-yum. im gonna watch it again!

the good: the action sequences, the nostalgia, the joneses.
the bad: george lucas's shit.
the ugly: the cgi monkeys from jumanji.
the verdict: 8 crystal skulls (what else?!).


indianero jai.

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INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL by obi

[CAUTION: SPOILERS AHEAD]

Henry Jones Junior is back and with a greaser kid in tow!

After getting entangled with an organized Russian archaeological crime ring, Indiana Jones was forced back to adventure from a teaching profession as he search for the mystery of the stolen alien artifact (from Roswell). Along the way, he was reacquainted with his former ladylove, Marion Ravenwood, and later on learned that greaser junior, Mutt Williams, is his own kid from her. One happy family reunion! La la la...

This happened in Peru where they were able to find the Crystal Skull in the hands of the Russian archenemy Irina Spalko. The Crystal Skull turns out to be the actual cranium of the alien specimen and Irina believes that it can grant her unimaginable psychic powers. To ensure this, she has to find the Alien Temple with the help of a barely sane Professor Oxley and the Indy Jones motley crew.

In a daring escape, they were able to break away from the Russian band snatching the Crystal Skull itself. Jones searched for the temple to return the skull to its rightful owners. Irina and his gang however caught up with Indy inside the temple as his traitor friend, Mac, left homing devices on their trail. Later on, greed for power and wealth left Irina and Mac dead as the Crystal Skull was claimed by the alien entity that owns it. The whole temple was engulfed by water, the very stereotypical 80's flying saucer whisked away, and from an elevated refuge Indiana Jones, Marion Ravenwood, and their kid exchanged cheesy remarks that screams "KIDDO's THE NEXT INDIANA JONES on SEQUELS!".

Steven Spielberg. George Lucas. Harrison Ford (Han Solo). John Williams. These are people that I so look up to and are involved in this movie. But as much as I want to toss in an all-out kudos, the film has a healthy share of major boo-boos.

There were a LOT of cheesy scenes and exchanges between Indy and Marion were reminiscent of the classical Han Solo and Princess Leia word-duels. There are scenes that din't really help the flow of the film but just a lame attempt to spark a romantic/heroic feel. It's pretty comical or engaging sometimes, yes, but most of the time it's just outright uncalled-for.

Story's far worse BUT it could be forgiveable since, yeah, this movie has tons of impractical stunts and impossible feats but it's just being true to the earlier Indy films which have an overload of that too. What's with Indiana Jones surviving a nuclear explosion locked inside a fridge? *smiles* So keep those brains on your bags and enjoy the movie only for what it's worth. I heard the script was rushed (maybe, to catch up with an aging Ford? hehehe...) so y'know what to expect.

Casting is a bit of a downer too. Aside from Harrison Ford and Cate Blanchett (Irina Spalko), I find the rest of the cast lacking. Shia LaBeouf (Mutt Williams) already looks too off for the role of a young bruiser, how much more as Indy's kid. I dunno if they intended it that way but I'd rather see a more hard-edged depiction - tough kid for a tough dad (he looks more foolish to me). Karen Allen (Marion Ravenwood) was never convincing. I think she's trying hard (THIS hard) to create that "kilig" factor between her and Indy... to a point that it's just annoying already. Really. As I said earlier, Ford did a good job. But why not, he'll just have to portray an old character of an old role. This, I dig because the script readily accepted that Henry Jones Junior has aged and it verily manifests in the movie. I sooo like the American Diner brawl with matching "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" tune. It outright date-stamped the settings to the 50's.

The cinematography rocks. The musical score too. Spielberg wanted to capture the feel of the classical trilogy and he did a good job on this one. With how the movie was captured alone, you can't really tell that this has been done more than a decade(?) after the last Indiana Jones. It's as if it is still filmed during the 80's. The limiting of the use of computer-aided graphics also contributed for this effect.

To sum it up, the storyline made it a cheesy sci-fi B-movie and the production, no matter how cool, barely justified everything up.

AND I'm sorry to myself that it has to come from me. (I love Indy *sniffs*)

5 out of 10.

No... 5.5 out of 10.

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SPEED RACER by jaiskizzy

the gist: speed racer can't think of anything else but racing and his older brother, rex. tragedy strikes the family when rex dies in a race crash. speed then grows up to continue his brother's legacy and becomes the most sought-after driver in the land. he receives a very sybaritic offer from a powerful businessman named royalton but turns it down for his family's sake. realizing that the past races were fixed, speed revs the mach 5 up to victory and joins forces with the mysterious racer x to finally put on the breaks to the evil mogul's schemes.

even with the wachowski's cinematic aptitude, translating an anime series into a 2-hour live action movie is no fraction of pastry. book adaptation, although a burden in itself, is in a way easier because you only rely on the text and let the imagination soar. but for cartoons, you have to be able to siphon its essence and inject it into flesh without destroying it. the wachowskis have managed a nigh-perfect transition and the result is a frenetic display of screaming aesthetics no other directors haves ever attempted. from beginning to end, you are optically assaulted with colors and effects that do not fail to dazzle. the races are just epilepsy-inducing graffiti painted with a palette of skittles. there's fight scenes with anime-ish motion streaks, all with seamless multilayer wipe editing. and this is probably the first time ive seen a scrolling end credits with pulsating colors. speed racer is, put simply, a visual exercise in pushing the proverbial envelope.

that is, of course, expected of the film. but plotwise, it doesn't really have the same edge. no matter how perilous the tracks are or how brutal the racers are, you bet your ass that speed racer will win it. the dull story, however, is balanced out with humor, care of almost-annoying spritle and the great chimpanzee chim-chim, and heart, that if you could stay awake through the lengthy conversations, which i guess were inserted as breather scenes from all that racing razzmatazz, you'd figure out why this is marketed as a family movie. other than that, contain your nitpicking nerves for a while and just enjoy the show. the trick is to shake off your academy award druthers and allow it to take you for a spin.

speed racer could have been anyone who had the boy-toy looks since it's kind of a no-brainer role. be cute, have angst, drive fiercely. emile hirsch did okay but he didnt really own that role as much as tobey maguire did peter parker. but it was great to see him in the blue-shirt and red bandanna outfit. it would have been nice if they made racer x even cooler and not seem like just some x-men reject. matthew fox looked kinda lost (pun not intended. really). rain (hate that name) looked cool kickin ass in his white racesuit with dragon print and scary in girl's clothing. and the 'stached john goodman in red shirt and blue jumper looked like super mario. surprised to see seibei samurai, btw, even though he was underused. but if there was one cast member who made this live-action anime movie a darn live-action anime movie it was none other than christina ricci. she's never been this cute since wednesday. she is so cute that if a carebear and a kitten mated, their offspring would cuddle a christina ricci doll in its sleep. also, kudos to the monkey, who looked great in a suit.

finish line: after their directorial hiatus, the wachowskis have returned and machined a vibrant kaleidoscopic movie fueled with the ebullience of anime. it aint no blockbuster breakthrough like the matrix but it sure was one good acid-trip ride.


the good: the visuals, the family values, the monkey!
the bad: prolonged talky scenes, mediocre villain
the ugly: henchman whose finger became piranha dinner
the verdict: 7 chim-chim "cookies"


speed raper.

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IRONMAN by jaiskizzy

the gist: in this film adaptation of the marvel comic book series, robert downey, jr. stars as tony stark, an alcoholic, philanderous wealthy industrialist who is kidnapped by terrorists after introducing his latest missile design, the jericho, and coerced to develop the destructive weapon for their nefarious plans. but stark instead creates a hi-tech armor suit, which he uses to escape. stark returns home to start a new lease in life and repair the damage that his weapons, in the wrong hands, have caused. and so, he dons an upgraded version of his combat cataphract and becomes the heavy metal superhero iron man! black sabbath song commence in full volume!

raise your hand if you've seen the movie. i think we could all agree that it is goddarn good. comic book fan or not. as the first comic book film handled by its mother company, marvel studios, iron man is a testament of respecting the source material. they made the necessary changes but held their brainchild close. the end result: a smooth as chrome origin story greased with just the right amount of action. jon favreau should start a special class on from-comicbook-to-movie 101.

who is jon favreau? he directed elf with will ferrell and zathura, the quasi-sequel to jumanji. he's foggy nelson in daredevil, the guy who couldn't shoot the basketball in the office. yes that guy. no offense to him, but it's just weird that that same plump goof made this masterpiece that is at par with steven spielberg blockbuster levels. i mean, you have bryan singer who directed the usual suspects and the first two x-men movies and then makes the supercrap superman returns. it wasnt that bad but obviously we'd expect more from him. switcheroo, and you have jon favreau who is not necessarily an underdog but i really had no idea that he had the craftsmanship to make iron man as great as it is, so much that it's being heralded as one of the greatest comic book movies ever. busloads of bravos to you, mr. favreau.

speaking of bravos, an even longer queue of buses to robert downey jr. that's perfect casting right there. not only does he have the alcoholic background in real life, but he fit the likable asshole persona snug tight. even when he had his "change of heart" he still had remnants of his careless bastard attitude in there, as proof that no one really changes overnight. different car, same driver. the rest of the cast did just as well, especially the dude himself playing obadiah stane, but clearly this was a one-man (or one-ironman) show. im pretty sure even the great al pacino would be dodging downey jr.'s snappy tongue, which btw is mostly improv. also, the cg-fucking-i is a-fucking-mazing. you just couldn't tell which is cgi and which isn't. the dudes at ilm really did their homework here.

a movie this great definitely calls for a sequel. im pretty sure they have the blueprint laid out already, what with those "hints". oh and if you are a comic book geek, stay after the end credits have rolled, okay?

the good: acting, cgi, the flow of the story, everything except...
the bad: the lack of a recognizable theme music.
the ugly: the terrorists, of course.
the verdict: 9 sonic paralysis gizmos.


ironicman

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